The year is 2013 and my teal mug sits full of coffee on an overly crowded nightstand. The same mug once sat on an immaculate kitchen shelf up, high out of my reach. Maybe I’ll paint it.

I turn on my computer and upload an old home video…it’s a warm spring morning in the San Fernando Valley. The year is 1990. Light streams through pale pink curtains, landing on Mr. Panda Bear’s fuzzy black face. His eyes appear vacant to me now, yet I can access my memories of my small self, jumping into his cuddly embrace. The imagery opens a door to my consciousness, where time loses its hold. These perceptions coalesce and evoke an outpour of dreamlike sensory memories. My purpose is to hold onto how the surreal becomes folded into the real. I take a screen shot and print the aged Hi-8 grainy digital image and place it into my folder to revisit later.

I examine life as a stream of encounters with the physical world, challenging myself to slow down in order to experience the evoked feelings of affection, anxiety, disgust and desire. Choosing images and painting them fuels me to consider the details of my reality, whether working from life, quick snapshots, old family photographs, or screenshots taken from home videos. This process brings to light that the way we take care of our personal objects in our everyday lives provides a projective for how we interact with the outside world. As the physical world becomes more and more virtual, I am forcefully drawn back to the physical panels and paper to ground my expression. Examining personal objects and seemingly simple moments helps me to face my own internal struggles with materiality, often resulting in discoveries of beauty, humor, and nostalgia. My intention is to capture the expansiveness within the still, yet fleeting moment.